.:: Fire The Housewife ::.

So, in a recent excursion to the Elliott Bay Book Store (which is moving far, far from Elliott Bay due to the poor economy and I just needed to go back there again before they left that amazing location) I discovered this book:

Let’s talk about this book.  Basically, this is a wonderful little guide to making sustainable living more manageable and easy.  Lots of recipes and tips and ideas (we’ll be using a few of the slug deterrents in our garden this year.).  Here’s the problem.  I have always loved harsh cleaners, bleach, anything that says “KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN”.  But I also know that those things are bad for the environment and that if I’m going to do my part in every other way (The Boyfriend frequently uses the phrase “YOU’RE RECYCLING TOO MUCH!”), I should be doing my part with my cleaning products.  We started out small, we purchased the Clorox Green Works products, I switched a few things to Seventh Generation, then I found this book.

THIS BOOK.  This book is probably the bane of The Boyfriend’s existence.  But this book.  I love it.  Not only does it have some excellent recipes for cleaning products, but there is a myriad of  tinctures, salves, and tonics for health problems and first aid.  I love homeopathic type medicines, I frequent our local PCC so I can wander through the aisles of health products.  I am really excited to try a few of these things out.  I’ve made lists of plants and herbs I can grow in our garden that can be used for all sorts of other good things.

The book covers Health and First Aid, Non-Toxic Cleaning and Body care, and Gardening.  The author, Raleigh Briggs, made this interesting and not so harsh and scary.  I imagine if we sat down for a conversation and I told her of my secret love of makeup products and bleach she wouldn’t be mad at me, but would just give me some other options and send me merrily on my way.  She also lives in Seattle so a little part of me feels like I’m supporting someone local.  Oh! and the book is published through a smaller company in Bloomington, IN, so a part of me feels like I’m supporting the Midwest too. GO MIDWEST!  Plus at the grand cost of $7, even if you’re just mildly interested or looking for something to read it’s a pretty affordable way to go.  What I’m saying is. Go buy this book.  Read it, it’s really interesting.  Go out and buy some borax and some spray bottles and start being better for the environment.

You can buy Make Your Place via Amazon HERE

I seriously mean OH BOY.  I set out on this little adventure just wanting a stinking brownie.  I love brownies.  But these brownies.  Oh boy…these brownies.  Let’s just hope these brownies make it until The Boyfriend gets home from work.  These brownies are the reason I ran an extra mile today.  The reason I did a whole extra workout on top of running.  These brownies are a real problem.

On the other hand these brownies are ridiculously easy to make.  You can dedicate about an hour of your life to them from beginning to end and then you’ll have a lot of new friends.  Trust me.

What you’ll need:

1 stick (1/2 cup) butter

1 cup sugar

1 Tbsp vanilla

2 eggs

1/2 c. flour

1/3 c. cocoa

1/4 tsp. baking powder

1/4 tsp. salt

3/4 cup chocolate chips

1/2 cup toffee pieces

Those last two items are totally optional, I had them in my freezer and decided to throw them in, I think your brownies will probably be just as delicious if you decide to leave them out.  Just not as delicious as mine, sucker.

Start out by melting the butter. Here are my rules for melting butter.  Do not melt it all the way.  We have a pretty high powered microwave and I melt the butter for 30 seconds, there are still some pretty large chunks of butter left in there, just stir it up until it all melts.  If your butter is too hot when you add your eggs you’re in for a world of hurt. TRUST ME.  It’s a wise lesson to remember for everything you cook.

Okay, put your NOT OVERLY MELTED butter and your sugar and vanilla in a mixing bowl and mix on a very low speed (1 on my stand-up kitchen aid) until it’s pretty well combined and cooled off (especially if you overheated your butter). It’s going to look a whole lot like this:

It looks like it’s being mixed really fast, but it’s not.  Speed 1, people, speed 1.

Then add your eggs one at a time mixing well between each addition.

THEN COMES THE DRY STUFF!  I don’t know if you know this about me, but man, I love sifting stuff.  I could sift all day long, except for when it comes to brown sugar, I hate trying to get that stuff not to be lumpy, you can’t sift it because it gets all stuck in the sifter, but you can’t just use it because you get those crazy lumps.  Ugh.  Brown sugar.  End of rant.  Anyway, sift together that dry stuff and then use your whisk to mix it all together really well, I’ve never quite had the luck of sifting things together properly, if you’re more awesome than I am, just sift them together, but they need to be well mixed, the whole mixture will be brown.

Mix that into your buttery mixture by the tablespoon, otherwise you’re going to have a minor cocoa explosion.  I know all about the cocoa explosion and it isn’t pleasant.  There will be enough of a mess with this recipe later, save the trouble here and don’t cause a cocoa explosion.  Consider yourself warned.

Mix that well and then the next part you have to do by hand. With a spoon. I know, sorry.  Just throw in your chocolate chips and toffee pieces and mix it really well, I had to do some scraping to get some of the cocoa from my purely hypothetical explosion, but you won’t have that trouble, WILL YOU?!

Mmmmmmmm.

Grease your 9×9 pan and add the batter to it.  spread it out and put it in a 350 degree oven for about 20-30 minutes.  Just wait until it starts to pull away from the sides and then test it with a toothpick and see if the center is done.  Mine pulled away from the sides about 5 minutes before it was actually done, so just keep an eye on it.

Now, you can be done there if you want. Not me, though.  Ohhh, my favorite part of a brownie is when you frost it.  So frost it we must.   I definitely stole the recipe for the icing from a Hershey’s cookbook (and I’ll admit it, I adapted the brownies from a recipe in there too.) and it is just so darn good I decided to tell you about it.

You will need:

3 Tbsp. butter (softened)

3 Tbsp cocoa

1 Tbsp light corn syrup

1/2 tsp. vanilla (I used a full tsp, I like to live dangerously like that)

1 cup powdered sugar

2 Tbsp milk

You’d think I would have learned my lesson the first time around and stirred the cocoa and butter before using the mixer…but no, I didn’t. BE YE NOT SO STUPID. Stir that with a spoon and save the mixer for later.  Once you get that a little mixed add the corn syrup and vanilla and use your mixer to mix it really well.  It looks really appetizing at that point. Trust me. Add your powdered sugar and milk and mix with that spoon again to get it wet, then use your mixer for about 2 minutes to get it all ready to go.  It only makes about a cup of frosting, but that is more than enough for your brownies.

Here is where I made the ultimate mistake.  I just couldn’t wait.  I tried.  I thought I had let the brownies cool long enough (like 30 minutes, I swear!) But I didn’t  I frosted those things and I pulled one out and ate it and OH MY GOD WAS IT EVER DELICIOUS.  The real problem here is this…

This mangled, disheveled, crazy looking mound is the most delicious brownie you’ll eat this week.  You’ll have more sense than me, you’ll let it cool for more than 30 minutes, or at least you’ll put it in the freezer for 30 minutes so you can cut it and take it out appropriately.  Or you can be like me and eat a delicious mound of brownie and frosting 30 minutes after it came out of the oven so it’s still all warm and delicious.  You know, whatever you see fit.

I’m the queen of NEEDING THAT FOOD RIGHT NOW.  Last night it was scotcheroos.  You know, those rice crispy-like treats with the chocolate on top.  I NEEDED them.  So after a quick trip to QFC I had them.  The boyfriend understood, he NEEDED no bake cookies just as bad.

Heres how to make a scotcheroo in case you’re in desperate need.

1 cup Karo syrup

1 cup sugar

1 cup peanut butter

6 cups rice crispies

1 bag semi-sweet chocolate chips

1 bag butterscotch chips

Bring syrup and sugar to boil in medium saucepan. Remove from heat, add peanut butter, mix well.  pour over rice crispies in large bowl and mix well, press into 9×13 pan.  In double boiler melt chips together, pour over crispies, let cool as long as you possibly can, THEN EAT THE ENTIRE PAN IN ONE SITTING.

Dear Internet,

It has recently come to my attention that everyone thinks I’m a giant fattie.  I’m pointing at you, Brian Massie.  Yes, that’s right, I like him so much that I used his real name.  No nickname starting with The.  Wow. That’s love!! Anyway,  B. Massie and another pal of The Boyfriend’s at work have scoffed at me and apparently think that my hiding out at home all the time means I’m fat. MY BRAND NEW ABILITY TO WEAR SIZE 4 JEANS SAYS OTHERWISE. I just don’t want to live in a world where size 4 is fat.  You know what Internet?  Sometimes I want to eat at Top Pot and that’s okay.  I work out twice a day, 5 days a week, and that means it’s okay to eat a freaking cupcake whenever I want to.  Let that be a lesson to you all, eat cupcakes, it’s okay.

Anyway, my ability to eat cupcakes is not the main staple of my diet, in fact when I’m not eating cupcakes I eat some pretty healthy stuff.  Recently I have decided that perhaps I have a little bit of intolerance to flour, white flour especially. I’ve cut everything out of my life basically.  Sad but true.  I eat whole grain everything and feast upon Mack’s Flax, a flour free bread I really love.  Basically in a day I eat a ton of food but consume well under 1000 calories.  To prove to you all that I can bake something that fits into my pretty tight little diet I’m going to share with you all my Whole Wheat Flax Seed Muffins.

So, they’re pretty easy to make and only very very slightly labor intensive.  If you’re not my kitchen (and even my kitchen had to pick up a few supplies) you’ll probably need to go pick up some whole wheat flour, flax seed meal, oat bran (I secretly just used some oatmeal and ground it up a little in my cuisinart).  Everything else you will probably have on hand or can pick up on your normal trip to the store.  Just to make you feel even worse for thinking I’m such an unhealthy slob, I buy all organic too.  In fact the carrots and apples were purchased at the Ballard Farmers Market, so not only were they organic, they were locally grown too.

ON TO THE RECIPE!

1 1/2 c. whole wheat flour

3/4 c. flax seed meal

3/4 c. ground oatmeal (or oat bran)

1 c. brown sugar

2 tsp. baking soda

1 tsp.  baking powder

1/2 tsp. salt

2 tsp. cinnamon

1 tsp. allspice

2 medium Fuji Apples (peeled and grated)

1 1/2 – 2 c. carrots (peeled and grated)

4 Tbsp. flax seeds

3/4 c. milk

2 eggs

1 Tbsp vanilla

optional: nuts, dried fruit, anything your little heart desires.  I used dried cranberries.

Go ahead and sift together the whole wheat flour and the flax seed meal.  There will be some residual hulls and whatnot in your sifter,  I just dumped those on in.  I like my hulls.  If that REALLY grosses you out I suppose you could trash them, but why would you want to do such a thing?

Now, I didn’t have any oat bran and I didn’t feel like making the boyfriend scoop anything more out of the giant bins at PCC so I used the oatmeal I had on hand and just ran it through the food processor until it was a little more fine, not so fine that it’s powdery though.  Go ahead and mix that on in with your flour and flax, also add in the other dry ingredients, all the way down to that allspice.  It’ll look a lot like this…

I like to live dangerously so I didn’t sift everything, this is not going to mess up your results this time, trust me.

Now, this is when things get tricky.  I definitely peeled and grated the carrots and apples all alone while The Boyfriend sat and watched.  Gosh I hope he doesn’t read that because then he’ll be sad I told the internet didn’t help when in reality he actually peeled the carrots and grated them for me with our extra grater.  He’s just that grate great!  So, once you’ve grated these things at lightening speed like I did:

My hands are moving so fast they can’t be photographed.

Once I got those apples all grated they started to turn a little brown, so I threw some lemon juice on them, violently.  This isn’t a totally necessary step, but something about browning apples on the counter really grosses me out, so I did it.  Don’t judge.

You’re going to mix these carrots and apples into your dry ingredients.  Now here’s the catch.  These are going to have a definite texture in the finished product.  If you have a picky child or The Boyfriend you’re going to want to do more than grate these.  Probably go ahead and run them through the food processor until it’s just mush, or use apple/carrot sauce.  It’s going to make a slight difference in your finished product texture, but there is a definitely a texture to these muffins and if you think you or your loved ones can’t handle that, you should probably go ahead and puree, puree to your heart’s content.

In a separate bowl mix the eggs, milk, and vanilla, then add it to your dry-ish mixture (it’s not so dry after you add the fruit.  On a side note, I did not use my mixer for these muffins because you only want to get the entire mixture wet, you don’t want to over mix it.   Once you have your wet and dry ingredients mixed together start adding in the other things you love.  I added 4 Tbsp of Flax Seed (because I love it) but you can leave that out if you want.  I also added some dried cranberries that I had left over in my cabinet.  But you can add any little thing you want.  I will add, the muffins would have been a little boring without the cranberries, so maybe think about adding something with a little extra flavor, you could even do chocolate chips!!

Now, I decided to make my own muffin papers out of some parchment paper, but regular muffin papers are fine too.  These muffins don’t rise much so you can definitely fill them pretty full.  Bake them at 350 for what will feel like forever.  I’m sorry I didn’t time it for you, just bake them until a knife comes out clean.

They will definitely make your whole house smell like a delicious factory. Trust me.

As a final thumbs down to those of you who think I’m a secret internet fatty, here’s the nutritional facts before you add any of the extras (mine includes the flax seeds, so feel free to add those and you’ll fit within my nutritional fact parameters.) by the way, the serving size is 1 muffin.

I know you’ve all been waiting for this.  For the stories of how I burned down my kitchen with my new set of kitchen torches.  How the boyfriend’s beard is gone because I singed it off waving my hands around wildly while holding a lit torch. All so I could make desserts like this…

Well, you know what, YOU’RE WRONG.  No major fires, no accidents, no nothing!  And they turned out so pretty and so delicious.  The only thing I’d do differently is use a milk chocolate ganache instead of a bittersweet chocolate ganache.  Don’t hold that against me though.  You can do it better at your house. WITH YOUR TORCH. OH YOU DON’T HAVE ONE?! YOU DIDN’T GET TWO OF THEM FOR CHRISTMAS? OH TOO BAD!

So, I wanted to get the s’moriest of effects so, I tried hard to think of a way to do a graham cracker flavored cupcake.  I settled upon a gingerbread cupcake, which I decided was too spicy, but I did it anyway.  Next time I think I’ll substitute the molasses with something a little less…demanding.  I got 99 problems, and molasses is seriously one of them. SERIOUSLY.

Gingerbread Cupcakes

2/3 cup molasses         1 tsp. baking soda

½ c. sugar                     2 ½ c. flour

½ c. butter                    1 c. sour milk

2 tsp. ginger                   2 eggs beaten

1 tsp. cinnamon

Heat molasses, sugar, shortening, ginger, and cinnamon to boiling, stirring constantly.  Cool about 30 minutes.  Sift together soda and flour.  Add to cooked mixture alternatively with milk and eggs.  Bake at 350° until toothpick comes out clean.

The frosting is wonderfully easy and seriously tastes exactly like a marshmallow that has been melted.  I was amazed. So was The Boyfriend, and after I made him eat that egg puff full of pumpkin he was a little weary of me screaming “OMG COME TRY THIS! RIGHT NOW!”

So, I actually used some powdered egg whites because I’m not really that awesome about using up the yolks after I separate them, and yes I should probably bake a pound cake or whatever other dessert uses a ton of yolks (creme brulee??) but I just don’t do it. Okay? I Don’t.  ANYWAY.  I used the Wilton powdered egg white, it’s just 2 tsp of powder plus 2 Tbsp of water.  Just do the math, not that hard if you decide to go that route.

Faux Marshmallow Frosting

1 ¼ c. granulated sugar      4 egg whites
1 Tbsp vanilla

If using egg whites (not replacement) first combine whites and sugar on double boiler until mixture reaches 160°.  Move to mixer bowl with whisk attachment and beat until room temperature or stiff peaks.

After you’ve done all this, thrown a layer of ganache (I just melt a cup of chocolate chips with 1Tbsp of butter and maybe 2 Tbsp of milk.) in between the cake and the frosting you get this…

You can go ahead and oooh and ahhh at this point.  I’ll allow it.  I know, they’re gorgeous.  These are the babycakes, because we all know how much I love babycakes (they’re just so cute!)

Then you get to pull out the torch.  Seriously, it’s so fun. Get one. Get a fire extinguisher. Get some butane. Start lighting fires.

Admit it, you think it looks like fun.  You can be jealous.

These were definitely a first try and could use some tweaking, but really, cmon, these are like the cutest things you’ve ever seen, just go ahead and admit it.

So it has recently been brought to my attention that the only way to get The Boyfriend to eat healthy foods is to lie to him.  I had exhausted my repertoire of “if you eat all your carrots you won’t have to wear your glasses anymore!” and “SUPER MAN LOVES HIS PEAS” and skipped right on to just crying whenever he turned down the vegetables I cooked.

I’ve been looking at this Deceptively Delicious cookbook since, oh, about our 2nd date (which was actually just a couple weeks ago.) but while we were in Kansas I found it on clearance at Hasting for like 5 dollars.  It’s normally like 20.  MAJOR BARGAIN. I BASICALLY JUST PUT IT INTO MY PURSE AND WALKED ON OUT OF THAT STORE. THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING TO YOU RIGHT NOW.  I also found out that it was written by this lady named Jessica Seinfeld. As in Jerry Seinfeld’s wife. Which was just one more reason for The Boyfriend to enjoy the foods “Look, The Boyfriend, Jerry Seinfeld likes it! Maybe Kramer and Elaine too!”  We won’t talk about George, because I mean, duh.

So one morning for breakfast I made these:

That’s right, Baked Egg Puffs with Yellow Squash or Butternut Squash organic pumpkin puree.

These are soooo easy, trust me, so easy.

All you’re going to need is:

Cooking Spray

2 large eggs

4 large egg whites

1/2 cup organic pumpkin puree

2 Tbsp Cheddar Cheese

2 Tbsp flour

1/2 tsp baking powder

1/4 tsp salt

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.  Coat 4 ramekins with cooking spray and set onto a baking sheet.

In a large bowl, whisk the eggs, egg whites, squash puree, cheese, flour, baking powder, and salt until combined. Pour the mixture into the cups and bake until they’re puffy and not runny when you poke it with a knife.

We definitely added more salt to ours because it needed some kick, I think it’s be really good to pop it out of the ramekin (which was surprisingly easy) and eat it with some salsa.  You can taste the pumpkin, but it’s so very slight that even people who aren’t squash friendly can be friends with this.

Yay Jessica Seinfeld!

Here’s the Amazon link.

So, I suck at blogging.  I’m no good at updating when I bake things.  Who knew it was so difficult to actually go through the trouble of getting recipes together.

So we’re going to backpeddle a little and I’ll share with you all the things I’ve been making lately with the grand finale showing up, oh, whenever I get to it, of ME USING MY KITCHEN TORCH!

But for now…here’s a few things I’ve worked on lately… Starting with Christmas Candies

This was quite a process, I decided to make Fudge, Toffee, Peanut Butter Fudge, Divinity, Oreo Truffles, and Chocolate Truffles.

I’ve made most of these things before, but I think they turned out pretty good, minus the divinity which was experimented with quite a bit.  I’ll be trying it another day.

Have you ever sat down and thought about the ridiculous amount of butter that goes into making candies?  Or the supplies in general.  It’s disgusting. Trust me.

There are THREE POUNDS OF BUTTER OVER THERE.  That is enough to give you a pretty sweet heart attack, no questions asked.  Let’s not even talk about the amount of sugar, chocolate, marshmallow fluff, and cream cheese that is over there.  It was disgusting, trust me.  I couldn’t even eat these treats for a couple days and even then I took a large amount of the leftover back to Kansas for my family to eat.

So first, I’ve made this Peanut Butter Fudge before, you can look into that here. I did it a little differently and made it look a little more fancy.  By fancy I mean, I made a double batch.  MORE FAT = FANCY, YA’LL.

Now, onto the single item I made that caused The Boyfriend to drool all over everywhere even though it was by far the simplest thing ever.

Ready for this?

Seriously.

THE OREO TRUFFLE.

Before I even show you what this thing looks like, I’m going to tell you how to make it.  Get your pens and papers ready because it’s a real toughy.  You will need

1 pkg. Oreo Cookies

1 8 oz pkg. cream cheese (softened)

In your food processor crush the Oreos into a pretty fine powder, then mix together with the softened cream cheese.  Refrigerate for about 2 hours, roll into balls, dip in white chocolate.  Later you can make some fancy green drizzles on top like I did.

The Boyfriend has repeatedly requested these since Christmas and may or may not be getting a box of the for Valentines Day, I just love him that much I suppose.  They will, however, be drizzled in red and pink and maybe a few dipped in regular chocolate.  Like I said, don’t ruin that surprise for me BECAUSE HE NEVER READS THIS BLOG OR ANYTHING.

The other items are made from some tried and true recipes, such as the fudge recipe off the back of the marshmallow fluff jar (The Boyfriend has seriously bragged to people about this recipe, even after I told him it’s not some ancient recipe, it’s off the jar of Kraft Marshmallow Fluff)  Though, in a taste test performed in the IT room apparently my fudge wins out over the gourmet fudge that some Alaskans sent to them.  I’m just that good.

The chocolate truffles are courtesy of none other than the Pioneer Woman.

And the divinity, well, the divinity is from a cookbook The Grandma used to use, and while every other time she or I made divinity it has turned out wonderfully, this time it didn’t turn out.  It was dry and just not right.  I did experiment with adding some other flavors to it though which was interesting and definitely something I may try again in hopes of the divinity turning out a little better.

Successful post 1 or 20000 things I’ve made and never blogged about.

…is the mail when you get back.

That is beside the fact you haven’t been at work for 2 weeks, that was really the best part.  But I guess when you’re facing work the next morning, the next best thing is that you get to open all the Christmas cards you were sent and didn’t recieve because of your mail hold.  Also, all the packages and candy and nice things people said about your blog! Can you believe it! More than one person referenced my blog in their Christmas cards!

I will admit though, the most squealing came when The Former Daycare Boss sent me pictures of T-Bo.  HE IS SO BIG.

Happy Holidays Everyone!! I recieved not one, but TWO kitchen torches for Christmas and also a fire extinguisher, so The Boyfriend said we could even get fuel for it.  It’s just a matter of time until I start posting all the flaming baked goods I’ll be making.  Just as a hint, I think I’m going to be making S’more cupcakes soon!

Thanksgiving is big. Really big.  Huge even.  This is the first year I undertook Thanksgiving alone, usually I would attend someone else’s Thanksgiving and just show up with the can of cranberry sauce (no stems!  See if you can name that movie.) Or I would at the very least have The Sister there to do all the gross stuff like take the giblets out of the turkey.  But this year, oh this year, it was all me.  I started the day before with this…

It’s highly recommended everyone start with this.  Especially if along with cooking Thanksgiving dinner for your The Boyfriend’s family.  Especially if your The Boyfriend tends to wait until you have spent a lot of time meticulously cleaning your house and your The Boyfriend decides that is a good time to leave his crap everywhere.  If YOUR THE BOYFRIEND DOES THIS I RECOMMEND THIS MORE THAN ANYTHING.

Aaanyway, I also recommend you get this cute little kid to come over and keep you company for a while.

It really lowers your stress level.  Just tell me it’s even possible to see that cute little bald head and not want to snuggle it to pieces.  Don’t tell her mother this or she’ll never bring her over again.

I had done a lot of cleaning the weekend before, but like any house there was cleaning to be done the day before still.  I cleaned every square inch of that house and also set the table.  I don’t think anything is better than a pretty table.  Especially when someone bought herself these awesome napkin rings long before Thanksgiving JUST WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO COME OVER AND EAT DINNER WITH HER.

So, all these things happened Wednesday, the day before the big day.  Thanksgiving takes a lot of planning, about a week before T-Day I sat down and made a menu, and got out the ol’ box of recipes and started listing every single thing I would need for each recipe.  Having a thorough list es muy importante.  Having functional Spanish, es…meh.  My menu for T-Day was as follows:

• Veggie Plate (Carrots, Cauliflower, Olives, Dip)
• Fudge
• Sweet Potatoes
• Corn
• Canned Cranberry Sauce
• Cranberry Salad
• Turkey
• Mashed Potatoes
• Gravy
• Ham
• Rolls
• Pumpkin Pie
• Chocolate Pie

For four people this was a crazy large amount of food.  What was even more awesome was that my job gave us a 25 lb turkey.  I did not know this was going to happen the weekend before WHEN WE WENT OUT AND BOUGHT ALL OF THE GROCERIES FOR THANKSGIVING, INCLUDING A TURKEY.  It would have been pretty nice to know that, but beggars can’t be choosers.  The best/worst part was, I tried to donate the huge turkey, I wanted some family to have a turkey that couldn’t have had one otherwise, but all the food banks and community dinners in the area did not need turkeys! I’m glad they were so full up, but I still would have loved to donate my turkey to them.

On Day 1 of T-day (the day before) I cooked both pies, made the beginnings of the cranberry salad, and was going to make the fudge, but housewives like me tend to get a little, uh, distracted when babies and wine come over to play.  I didn’t quite get to that fudge on Day 1.  Don’t worry, I was up at the crack of dawn on T-Day putting in the turkey and prepping the rest of the food.

Everything turned out wonderfully and despite the fact that it was an insane amount of work alone, I pumped it all out, the boyfriend made the ham, the fire, and this awesome beard….

We ended up with quite the buffet:

And this beautiful turkey, GO ME.

This post was exhausting, so I am refusing to include recipes today.  Instead, you can all leave nasty comments for The Boyfriend who was supposed to have a whole lot of other things updated and re-done on FTHW to make my life easier.  Gosh, you’d think after that huge Thanksgiving meal he would have been feeling, well, Thankful and Giving.

Happy Thanksgiving and here’s to time to stop eating real food and start eating all sugary Christmas food!

I am promising a fabulous Thanksgiving update VERY VERY SOON. I promise you. I promise it will be some time before Monday.